Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Adieu, little Ahmed: The bomb ... er ... clock maker (Satire)

The Editor
S.U.C.C.S., OH (PN)

Obama hugs Ahmed the bomb clock maker
After completing his “false flag”, trial run mission, little Islamist Ahmed the “clock maker” is returning to the lands of Mohammed (curses be upon him).  The announcement was made just 24 hours after Ahmed met with Barrack Hussein Obama, at which time he may have received new marching orders from our President.  Ahmed and his family have accepted the grateful invitation from the Sharia paradise of Qatar (rhymes with gutter, and for good reason) in order that he may continue his world renowned and unprecedented research into disassembling and reassembling antiquated digital clocks.  Inside sources, who refused to be identified, have revealed the Qatar Foundation for Education, Science and Community Development are interested in enrolling little Ahmed in their budding BOOT camp (Bombs Out of Obsolete Timepieces) program.

Insiders have also disclosed that Ahmed and his radicalized father, Mohamed Al Hassan (aka Mohamed Elhassan Mohamed), were at first reluctant to make the move until the Qatar government guaranteed little Amhed all the “pet” goats a Muslim boy could desire while offering his father an endless supply of imported Bacha bazi boys.  Ahmed’s Mother was unavailable for comment since she is no longer allowed to speak or be seen in public.

We bid thee adieu, little Ahmed.  You will be missed by a treasure trove of self-loathing American dupes.  May the wind always blow at the back of your camel and the laser sights of a AGM-114 Hellfire missile be "painted" on yours.

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